Going all the way back to 1957 for this worldwide hit by Australian Slim Dusty. After all we are playing the Brewers, and it probably sums up the feelings of both sets of fans on how their seasons have gone so far.
Speaking of 1957, it feels as if it has been that long since I was last at a game. That game being the rollercoaster events of the crazy 4-4 draw away at Exeter City in late December, which felt more like a defeat after being 4-1 up at half time and was all the more maddening as we were screwed over by more piss-poor officiating. It was the fourth time this season we had scored three goals or more in a match and not won.
Then there was the New Year’s Day debacle where the same useless ref we had away at Bristol Rovers ummed and ahhed about calling the game against Charlton Athletic off for what seemed like hours, finally only calling it off twelve minutes before it was due to kick off. With further pitch inspections being called seemingly all day, we had left it as late as possible to leave the house only to set off with it still in the air but making sure we were there before kick off if it did start, only to get most of the way down Wakehurst Drive before it was called off.
I didn’t make the trip up to the wastelands of South Yorkshire for the Barnsley game. And for the second time this season they steamrolled us for a 3-0 win. Then last week we didn’t have a game as Wigan Athletic were still in the FA Cup, so this is my first, and as it will turn out, only game in January, with us being in Spain when the away games against Stockport County and Mansfield Town are taking place.
In the meantime, we have let two of our loan signings, Cameron Bragg and Eddie Beach, return to their parent clubs, and the saga of Jay Williams has ended up with him unsurprisingly leaving to join up with Scott Lindsey at MK Dons. Coming the other way, we have recalled Antony Papadopoulos from his (quite successful) loan spell at Maidstone United, and have signed Ben Radcliffe from Derby County, although he had been on loan at manager Rob Elliot’s former side, Gateshead.
Eddie Beach going back to Chelsea does leave us with only the one goalkeeper in the squad. There was a rumour of Hull City’s Thimothee Lo-Tutala joining us on loan until the end of the season, but that seems to have disappeared into the ether.
And talking of disappearing into the ether, it has been announced that the monthly Reds magazine is no more, after four issues the club have pulled the plug on it. and so, we go back to being completely programme less. Helen has now heard back about the Devil’s Advocate scheme, and their first meeting will be the weekend of the Wrexham home game.
Two of the three postponed games have now been given new dates, with the Stevenage and Wigan games coming on consecutive Tuesday nights in February, sandwiching the Saturday home game against Wycombe Wanderers, giving us three home games in eight days. We still await a new date for the Charlton game.
The lack of games, and the less than great results in the ones we have played sees us go into today’s game in twenty-second in the table, behind Shrewsbury Town on goal difference after they beat Wrexham on Thursday night, and five points off safety, although we do have at least one game in hand on the four sides immediately above us in the table. We are two places and six points above our opponents today, Burton Albion, who sit rock bottom of the table.
When we played them earlier in the season on Bonfire Night, there weren’t any fireworks as it finished in a drab 0-0, where both sides were lucky to get nil. Our only previous league games against them were back in out first season in the league, where we also drew 0-0 away from home, but we did beat them 3-0 in the home fixture. What we wouldn’t give for a similar result today. There is also history of playing them in the Southern League and Conference over the years, spending twenty-five seasons in the same division as them between 1963 and 2009. As a team who were only promoted to the league two years before we were, they are another of the teams for who I can’t find any football cards for.
Burton rock up with Danilo Orsi, our star striker from last season leading the line. Let’s hope he doesn’t add to his impressive tally of goals at the Broadfield Stadium. On our side we have Jack Roles who played a couple of games for Burton on loan five years ago, and new signing Ben Radcliffe started his senior career there playing just the one game for them.
So, after a twenty-six-day break since the last home game it is back to the Broadfield Stadium today. Only to be met by nincompoops wearing Crawley Town, shirts, hats, and scarfs at the top of the walk in from the underpass, trying to sign people up to the Reform Party. Deliberately stood on the other side of the road from the site of the ground, but political scumbags from any party shouldn’t be allowed to be peddling their bullshit whilst wearing club colours.
After an even longer lay off, Reggie is back. I’m not sure he’s going to be up for any acrobatics, as it does look like he’s spent the last six months leading a very sedentary lifestyle. At least the team news has a positive, Jasper Sheik is on the bench, so we do have two active keepers, but it must have been a stealth recall from loan as there has been no mention of it from the club at all.
Being in the ground early and with some time to kill before kick-off I started doing the club survey. And wish I hadn’t, what an incoherent, meandering, overly long piece of shit, it makes my writing look like well informed bullet points. Why have one scale to rate things by when you can have three different ones. Some out of ten, some out of five, and others out of seven. Out of seven? Seriously? What the fuck? And why the fuck are we comparing the club to a film character, an animal, or a meal? And finally, any survey which takes over twenty minutes to complete is a waste of everyone’s time, both those taking it, and those having to decipher it.
Apparently, the new T Boards are working well and are very nice, but the information on them is out of date. Who would have thought that was possible?
Anyway, the game. Burton Albion are in an all-white kit, and we are in the all red. There is an early Burton corner, and we break from it, the Burton defender has Will Swan in a headlock, but there is no free kick. We get the ball into the box and have lots of touches in there, but it just won’t fall for anyone to try and get a shot away and it is cleared.
Lockets has his first bellow at the linesman, and the lino does have a giggle at it. I’m sure that feeling wore off the longer the match went on and the more Lockets got into his stride.
We are having a lot of good approach play, the interplay is good, but the final ball just isn’t there. There is the usual complete lack of protection for Tola Showumni. I dread to think what shape his shirt will be by the end, and he gets dragged down and gets nothing. It appears to be a concerted campaign, both from opposition players wanted to swap shirts with him from the first minute, and from the officials who all seem to think it is fine to have open season out on him. We are having a lot of the ball in the Burton half, but it takes a while to register the first shot, and Armando Junior Quitirna cuts in from the right and curls his shot well wide.
On the next attack we attack down the right after decent work from Showumni who plays it to AJQ, who lays it back to Jeremy Kelly, but his shot curls away from goal and goes wide. At the other end Burton have a shot well over the bar from outside the box. We attack again and a ball is played to Showumni on the edge of the box, he is dragged down from behind, but nothing given again. Burton break and their striker looks yards offside, but the flag stays down, we get back only for the striker to miscue their shot, and it dribbles into the net to make it 0-1.
We are back on the attack, having good possession and pressure, the ball comes to Kelly in midfield, and he plays Swan in, and his shot is well saved down low for a corner. It is taken deep and AJQ is dragged down beyond the far post as the ball sails out for a goal kick. There are muted appeals for a penalty. Dion Conroy plays the ball well out of defence, beating two players and he passes to Swan, who moves it on to AJQ and his shot is saved at the expense of a corner. It is played out and eventually comes to Kelly who swings it back in and Swan’s shot is wide.
There are two added minutes at the end of the half, and we almost get a gift. AJQ has the ball down the left and his cross is straight at the keeper, but he drops it and only just drops on it before it rolls over the line. And the half time whistle goes with us trailing 0-1.
At half time Reggie is going around and throwing t-shirts into the crowd. He stops to do one just in front of where we are. He winds up and throws it hard but hits the board at the top of the east marquee and falls in the walkway. It was such a hard throw that Reggie’s shirt comes untucked and shows a flash of white belly.
There is a half time substitution with Toby Mullarkey going off to be replaced by new signing Ben Radcliffe. Who within a couple of minutes manages to give the ball away when attacking and then picks up a yellow card for blocking the attacker off on the counterattack. We have a free kick just inside the Burton half, which Kelly takes long and Showumni gets on the end of it, but his header is well over the bar. We win a corner and as it comes in there is a free kick given against us. There is a lot of pushing and shoving and arguing after it, mainly involving Conroy.
Burton have a bit of pressure, they have a shot that is over the bar. Then they win a corner which we clear before making a second substitution with Max Anderson going off to be replaced by Rushian Hepburn-Murphy. Only for Burton to win another corner. And then for us to attempt Hari Kari as neither Conroy or JoJo Wollacott make a decision as a ball bounces slowly between them in out own half, only for neither of them to get to it and they allow the Burton attacker in first, but thankfully his touch takes it a bit wide and cover gets back for us to clear the ball.
There are two more subs, with Kelly and Swan going off to be replaced by Bradley Ibrahim and Tyreese John-Jules. A clearance from Charlie Barker hits a Burton player and balloons over the west stand for ball loss one of the day. The Burton player then does the dying swan act to waste some more time and Ibrahim picks up a booking for trying to “help” him off the pitch.
We win a throw down near the right corner flag. Barker throws it long into the box, and it bounces around a bit and Showumni gets a flick on it, and it floats over the keeper and into the net and we have equalised 1-1. AJQ appeared to pick up a booking before the restart.
Pretty much straight away we attack down the left, RHM feeds Showumni and his cross is just behind TJJ, but AJQ is following it up, but he skies the shot, and it clears the Eden Utilities Stand for ball loss number two. It is all us now, and another ball into the box sees a shot and the ball ricochets off half a dozen players and body parts and claims for a handball are ignored. As Burton clear Panutche Camara gets a booking for a blatant pull back. RHM gets another shot off, but it is wide, and we make our last substitution with Ade Adeyemo going off to be replaced by a returning Harry Forster.
The ball is in the Burton box again. A Showumni shot is blocked and it goes out to RHM, and his shot is saved and cleared just before it spins out for a corner. Barker is next to pick up a booking. And an absolute joke of one as he clearly won the ball, and it wasn’t a foul. We break down the right and the ball is played to TJJ, but his shot is well over the bar. The ball is worked to Showumni, and the shot is just wide. Then played down the right and switched over to the left to RHM, he cuts inside and shoots, but it is just wide.
There are five added minutes. AJQ wins a free kick for being hacked down on the edge of the area, but there is no sign of any yellow card for a Burton player. AJQ takes, but he blasts it high and wide, and the chance is gone, and the final whistle goes with the score 1-1.
The crowd was announced as being 3,521 with 188 hardy souls making the trip down from Burton, and picking up from some of our away songs repertoire.
A draw does nobody any favours, and it feels like two points dropped rather than a point gained. The point sees us go up a place in the league, jumping back over Shrewsbury Town, but we are still five points off safety as Bristol Rovers won. We really need to be converting more of the plethora of chances we create. Sixteen shots but only four on target tells a story, and the number of times we don’t get a shot off at all is frustrating as hell. And it doesn’t bode well for the rest of the season with the apparent lack of transfer activity.
Two away games follow, against fellow promoted clubs from last year Stockport County and Mansfield Town, before the final other promoted club in two weeks’ time as we host Wrexham. All of which are tricky bastards, but we need to get something out of those games.
Come on you reds.