Introduction
The first rule of Flanagan’s Running Club is everyone should be telling everyone they know about Flanagan’s Running Club! After all, sharing is caring.
Feel free to forward on to anyone you want, tell people about it the works, and just get them to sign up. It’s quick and easy at the website homepage of http://www.onetruekev.co.uk/ enter the e-mail address and select whether you want Flanagan’s Running Club or blog post updates or both and then hit submit.
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On This Day – 19th March
1649 – The House of Commons of England passes an act abolishing the House of Lords, declaring it “useless and dangerous to the people of England”.
1932 – The Sydney Harbour Bridge is opened.
It’s Minna Canth’s Birthday in Finland, and
Kashubian Unity Day in Poland.
365 Reasons To Be Proud To Be A Londoner – Magical Moments in London’s History
Boot and Bun
Sloane Rangers, pensioners, ludicrous football ticket prices – Chelsea has given so much to the world. It also included the Chelsea boot, patented by Queen Victoria’s shoemaker J. Sparkes-Hall today in 1851 (apparently she seldom wore anything else as she ruled a quarter of the planet). But surely the area’s most wonderful export is the Chelsea bun. This delicacy was first created in the 18th century at the Bun House by Grosvenor Row, where the buns were so good they drew hungry Hanoverian royalty. Bun fans of the lower orders also came flocking – on Good Friday in 1839 the Bun House sold almost a quarter of a million buns.
Chuck D Presents This Day In Rap And Hip-Hop History
1987 – DJ Jazzy Jeff & the Fresh Prince release their debut album “Rock The House” on Jive records.
Produced by the Philly duo as well as by Pete Harris, Dana Goodmman, and Lawrence Goodman, one of hip-hop’s first comedic albums since those of the Fat Boys, “Rock The House” featured the hilarious hit single “Girls Ain’t Nothing But Trouble,” which sampled the theme song from TV’s I Dream Of Jeannie.
The certified-gold album also featured the turntable wizardry of Jazzy Jeff as evidenced on the cult hit singles “The Magnificent Jazzy Jeff” and “A Touch Of Jazz”.
Reaching #83 on the Billboard charts and #24 on the R&B chart, the light-hearted album is a classic of its kind.
Births
1848 – Wyatt Earp
1921 – Tommy Cooper
1955 – Bruce Willis
Deaths
1950 – Edgar Rice Burroughs
2005 – John DeLorean
Number 1’s
Number 1 single in 1965 – Rolling Stones – The Last Time
Number 1 album in 1988 – Terence Trent D’arby – Introducing The Hardline According To Terence Trent D’arby
Number 1 compilation album in 2013 – Various – Trevor Nelson’s Ultimate Sessions
Drabble
A drabble is a complete story that is exactly one hundred words long.
Change the Station
He lay there, just coming around as the radio played on the window ledge. Gradually seeping into his consciousness, he was vaguely aware of the song playing. He knew the song, recognised the words and music, but struggled in the fog of his mind in the morning to recall its name.
Then the host of the morning show started talking, he had a guest on, and in his usual style was going for the full proctologist’s examination of the guest. It made his skin crawl, the same fawning interview every morning.
He really had to stop listening to Radio Two.
Joke
Marty wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table. He sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. Marty looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotless, clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table. “Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. Love You!” So he goes to the kitchen and sure enough there is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating Marty asks, “Son, what happened last night?” His son says, “Well, you came home around 3 AM, drunk and delirious. Broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and gave yourself a black eye when you stumbled into the door.” Confused, Marty asks, “So, why is everything in order and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?” His son replies, “Oh, that! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you said, “Lady leave me alone! I’m married!”
Random Items
Facts
The first team to win the League Championship 3 times in a row was Huddersfield Town in the 1920’s, who for the first 2 of the 3 years were managed by Herbert Chapman, who then went on to manage Arsenal, who in the early 1930’s became the second team to achieve this feat. Herbert Chapman retired before the start of their 3 championship winning seasons.
Everton are the only team in the football league whose name does not come from a location where the club is from.
Thoughts
Why don’t sheep shrink when it rains?
If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
Forgotten English
Phitoness
A Witch.
Words You Should Know
Allegory
A story, painting or similar work whose characters and content symbolizer a deeper meaning than is at first apparent. John Bunyan’s seventeenth-century allegory of the Christian’s path to Heaven, The Pilgrim’s Progress, has characters with the expressive names of Giant Despair and Mr Valiant-for-Truth, while George Orwell’s Animal Farm is an allegory of political events in Russia, with the pigs Napoleon and Snowball representing Stalin and Trotsky respectively. The word comes from the Greek for ‘to speak figuratively’ and the related adjective is allegorical.
Popular Expressions – What They Mean And Where We Got Them
Little Rabbits Have Big Ears
A twentieth-century Australian modification of the old proverb ‘little pitchers have great ears.’ The ear of a pitcher is the handle, which is often ear shaped. The phrase ‘asses as well as pitchers have big ears’ is also common.
They all mean that grown-ups should watch their language when talking in front of small children, who often pick up many a hint that the speaker might wish to have passed unnoticed.
Rappers of the Nineties Trumps
Flash Fiction
Something between the 100 word shortness of a Drabble, and the short story, these are works of fiction somewhere between five hundred and seven hundred words.
Night Owl
Steve was hot. It was nearly midnight. He had three fans on around him, but still sweat leaked from every pore. The last time it had been this hot for so long he’d been a kid. He couldn’t remember the heat, so much as the invasion of ladybirds. They’d covered every surface on Weston-Super-Mare beach near the Grand Pier. Regardless of what those who could remember 1976 said, Steve was sure this summer was hotter.
The air conditioning in the building he was guarding was off during his shift. It worked from 7am to 7pm, the day guard’s shift. For Steve’s twelve hours there were just the fans. It wasn’t as if he could leave a door open, it was a secure site. He couldn’t risk having some random walk in off the street. Let alone the wildlife that peered in at him during the night. Foxes, badgers and deers were the main culprits, walking up to the glass monstrosity he worked at protecting. One night he’d been sure he’d seen a bear. But where was a bear going to have come from in West Croydon? It’d probably been the heat making him hallucinate.
Steve set off very slowly on his rounds, stopping to empty his bladder first. He’d been drinking non-stop to try and keep hydrated and cool, but the side effect was the need to pee all the time.
The strip lights clicked on and lit the whole of the aisle of the first floor office. Motion detectors switched them on at night, and then turned them back off after ten minutes with no motion. There was nothing to see here, he stopped before halfway and went to the next floor. The second floor’s lights were already on.
That shouldn’t have been the case. No one was signed in, or supposed to be in the building. There was a window open about halfway along the office to the right. Steve tried to remember if the window had been open the last time he’d patrolled the building at 10pm, but he couldn’t. He’d only had a cursory glance around the floor when the lights had clicked on.
As he looked now, something moved, he caught the movement from the corner of his eye, and he heard a terrible screeching noise rushing towards him. His training went out of the window and he ran back to the stairs and down to his control desk, never even glancing back over his shoulder. He made the call to report an intruder and then sat at the desk to await the police.
A few minutes after the police had gone upstairs, they came down and stood at Steve’s desk not even attempting to hide their amusement.
“We’ve decided not to take the owl into custody Steve, we shepherded it out of the open window and closed it. You should be safe now.”
They left and Steve felt hotter than he ever had before. Mainly from the burning embarrassment he was feeling.
Leicester
Random Historic Item
Leicester Overlords
Hugh de Grentmesnil (1021-1098)
Overlord of Leicester from 1068 – 1098, given the land by William the Conqueror for service to the King in the conquest. The Domesday Book shows him to own most of the land / property in Leicester and the surrounding area.
Ivo de Grentmesnil (d1107)
Overlord of Leicester from 1098-1107, inherited the title from his father Hugh. Died while on Crusade in 1107 without issue. King Henry I ceded the lands to his sister’s son Robert Prudhomme of the Beaumont family, at which time the title Earl of Leicester was created.
A Leicestershire Church
St Guthlac’s
Situated on Holbrook Road in Knighton, this church was built in 1912 as a chapel of Ease to St. Mary Magdalene’s, Knighton. Built by Stockdale Harrison for the sum of £1000, it has no aisles, and is brick built, with timber on the outside. The organ was added in 1935.
St. Guthlac
Guthlac was born to a noble Saxon family in 673. As a youth he led a wild band of men on raids and robberies. After doing this for nine years he became stricken with remorse, and in 697 entered a monastery at Repton in Derbyshire. In 699 he retired to Croyland in the fens to live the life of a hermit. He is said to have been persecuted by evil spirits, and prayed for divine intervention, and was said to be given a three thonged whip to drive out the evil spirits. It is this three pronged whip that serves as his symbol. Pilgrims came to him for spiritual advice, healing and prophecy. He died in 714, and Croyland Abbey (now destroyed) was built on his grave.
Top Ten
The most covered songs of all time, according to the WhoSampledWho website. Not including traditional folk songs.
No | Artist | Track | Number of Times Covered |
1 | Helen Jepson | Summertime | 228 |
2 | The Beatles | Yesterday | 197 |
3 | Elsie Carlisle | What Is This Thing Called Love? | 166 |
4 | The Beatles | Eleanor Rigby | 153 |
5 | Simon & Garfunkel | Bridge Over Troubled Water | 153 |
6 | Dusty Springfield | The Look Of Love | 148 |
7 | Bill Withers | Ain’t No Sunshine | 142 |
8 | John Lennon | Imagine | 135 |
9 | Wham! | Last Christmas | 133 |
10 | Bing Crosby | White Christmas | 131 |
Cathedral Fact Files
Cathedral | Ripon Cathedral | ||
Dedicated To | St Peter and St Wilfred | ||
Type | Medieval | Architecture | Perpendicular |
Religion | COE | Tower / Spire | 3 Towers |
Site Founded | 657 | Height (External) | 121ft |
Church Founded | 1180 | Height (Internal) | 64ft |
Bishopric Founded | 1836 | Length | 297ft |
Current Bishopric Founded | 1836 | Width | 156ft |
Thirty-Three And One Third Revolutions Per Minute
The Eagles – Hotel California
Hotel California was the fifth studio album by American rock band the Eagles, and is one of the best-selling albums of all time. Three singles were released from the album, each reaching high in the Billboard Hot 100: “New Kid in Town” (number 1), “Hotel California” (number 1), and “Life in the Fast Lane” (number 11). The album became the band’s best-selling album after Their Greatest Hits (1971–1975). It has been certified 26× Platinum in the U.S., and has sold over 42 million copies sold worldwide. The album was ranked number 37 on Rolling Stone’s list of “The 500 Greatest Albums of All Time”.
The album was recorded by Bill Szymczyk at the Criteria and Record Plant studios between March and October 1976, and then released on Asylum in December. It was their first album with guitarist Joe Walsh, who had replaced founding member Bernie Leadon, and is the last album to feature bassist Randy Meisner. It is their sixth album (including Their Greatest Hits (1971–1975)), and fifth of new material. The front cover is a photograph of the Beverly Hills Hotel by David Alexander. The album topped the charts and won the band two Grammy Awards for “Hotel California” and “New Kid in Town“. The album was nominated for Album of the Year but lost to Fleetwood Mac’s Rumours. A 40th anniversary special edition was released in November 2017.
The album was recorded between March and October 1976 at Criteria Studios, Miami, FL and Record Plant Studios, Los Angeles, CA, and produced by Bill Szymczyk. Although the band favoured Los Angeles, the producer Szymczyk wanted to record in Miami as he had developed a fear of living on a fault line in Los Angeles after experiencing an earthquake, and a compromise was then struck to split the recording at both places. While the band were recording the album, Black Sabbath were recording Technical Ecstasy in an adjacent studio at Criteria Studios in Miami. The band was forced to stop recording on numerous occasions because Black Sabbath were too loud and the sound was coming through the wall. The last track of the album, “The Last Resort” had to be re-recorded a number of times due to noise from the next studio.
The front cover artwork is a photograph of The Beverly Hills Hotel shot just before sunset by David Alexander with design and art direction by Kosh. According to Kosh, Henley wanted him to find a place that can portray the Hotel California of the album title, and “portray it with a slightly sinister edge”. Three hotels were photographed, and the one with The Beverly Hills Hotel was selected as the cover. The photographer shot the image 60 feet above Sunset Boulevard on top of a cherry picker. As the image was taken from an unfamiliar position in fading light, most people did not initially recognize the hotel. However, when the identity of Beverly Hills Hotel was revealed, the hotel threatened legal action over the use of the image. The rear album cover was shot in the lobby of the Lido Hotel in Hollywood. The gatefold image shows the same lobby but with their friends and members of the band. Henley said: “I wanted a collection of people from all walks of life, It’s people on the edge, on the fringes of society.” A shadowy figure appears on the balcony above the lobby, leading to speculations over the person’s identity. Kosh designed a Hotel California logo as a neon sign which was used on the album cover and in its promotional materials. As it proved difficult to bend real neon tubings into the desired shape of the script, the neon effect of the logo was achieved with airbrush by Bob Hickson. Additional portraits of the band used in the album package and promotional materials were shot by Norman Seeff.
The album was released by Asylum Records on December 8, 1976 in vinyl, cassette and 8-track cartridge formats. It was considered for quadraphonic release in early 1977, but this idea was dropped following the demise of the quadraphonic format. Original vinyl pressings of Hotel California (Elektra/Asylum catalog no. 7E-1084) had custom picture labels of a blue Hotel California logo with a yellow background. These also had text engraved in the run-out groove of each side, continuing an in-joke trend the band had started with their third album On the Border. The text reads: Side one: “Is It 6 O’clock Yet?” Side two: “V.O.L. Is Five-Piece Live”, indicating that the song “Victim of Love” was recorded in a live session in studio, with no overdubbing. Joe Walsh and Glenn Frey confirm this on the inner booklet of The Very Best Of. This only referred to the instrumental track, however; the lead vocal and harmony for the chorus were added later. This was in response to those who criticized the Eagles’ practice of copious overdubbing of instruments and that they were too clinical and soulless in the studio. They wanted to demonstrate that they could play together without overdubs if they wanted to.
The album was nominated for several Grammy awards in 1978 and its title track “Hotel California” won the Record of the Year. The band manager Irving Azoff however refused requests by the Grammy producer for the band to attend or perform at the ceremony unless a win was guaranteed. The band therefore did not appear at the ceremony to collect their awards. Henley later said: “The whole idea of a contest to see who is ‘best’ just doesn’t appeal to us.”
The album first entered the US Billboard 200 at number four, reaching number one in its fourth week in January 1977. It topped the chart for eight weeks (non-consecutively), and it was certified platinum by the Recording Industry Association of America (RIAA) in a week of release. In its first year of release it sold nearly 6 million copies in the United States, and by July 1978 it has sold 9.5 million copies worldwide (7 million in the US and 2.5 million elsewhere internationally). On March 20, 2001, the album was certified 16x platinum by the Recording Industry Association of America, denoting shipment of 16 million in the United States, and has sold over 17 million copies in the US by 2013. Worldwide the album has sold 32 million copies. On August 20, 2018, the album was certified 26× platinum by the RIAA for 26 million units consumed in the United States under the new system that tallies album and digital track sales as well as streams.
Track listing
Side one
No. – Title – Writer(s) – Lead vocals – Length
1. – “Hotel California” – Don Felder Don Henley Glenn Frey – Don Henley – 6:30
2. – “New Kid in Town” – Henley Frey J.D. Souther – Glenn Frey – 5:04
3. – “Life in the Fast Lane” – Henley Frey Joe Walsh – Henley – 4:46
4. – “Wasted Time” – Henley Frey – Henley – 4:55
Side two
1. – “Wasted Time (Reprise)” – Henley Frey Jim Ed Norman – instrumental – 1:22
2. – “Victim of Love” – Henley Frey Felder Souther – Henley – 4:11
3. – “Pretty Maids All in a Row” – Walsh Joe Vitale – Joe Walsh – 4:05
4. – “Try and Love Again” – Randy Meisner – Randy Meisner – 5:10
5. – “The Last Resort” – Henley Frey – Henley – 7:25
Personnel
Eagles
Don Felder – guitars, backing vocals
Glenn Frey – guitars, backing vocals, keyboards, lead vocals
Don Henley – drums, percussion, lead vocals, backing vocals, synthesizer
Randy Meisner – bass, backing vocals, lead vocals, guitarrón
Joe Walsh – guitars, keyboards, backing vocals, lead vocals
Production
Bill Szymczyk – producer, mixing
Allan Blazek, Bruce Hensal, Ed Mashal, Bill Szymczyk – engineers
Jim Ed Norman – string arrangements, conductor
Sid Sharp – concert master
Don Henley, John Kosh – art direction
John Kosh – design
David Alexander – photography
Kosh – artwork
Norman Seeff – poster design
Kevin Gray – CD preparation
Ted Jensen – mastering and remastering
Lee Hulko – original LP mastering
Charts
Chart – Position
Australian Kent Music Report – 1
Austrian Albums Chart – 9
Canadian RPM Albums Chart – 1
Dutch Albums Chart – 1
French SNEP Albums Chart – 2
Italian Albums Chart – 12
Japanese Oricon LP Chart – 2
New Zealand Albums Chart – 1
Norwegian VG-lista Albums Chart – 1
Swedish Albums Chart – 3
UK Albums Chart – 2
US Billboard 200 – 1
US Billboard Top Country Albums – 5
West German Media Control Albums Chart – 3
Certifications and sales
Region – Certification – Certified units/Sales
Australia (ARIA) – 8× Platinum – 560,000
Austria (IFPI Austria) – Gold – 25,000
Canada (Music Canada) – Diamond – 1,000,000
Finland (Musiikkituottajat) – Gold – 30,933
France (SNEP) – Diamond – 1,365,000
Germany (BVMI) – Platinum – 500,000
Hong Kong (IFPI Hong Kong) – Platinum – 15,000
Japan (Oricon Charts) – 493,000
New Zealand (RMNZ) – 9× Platinum – 135,000
Spain (PROMUSICAE) – 4× Platinum – 400,000
Switzerland (IFPI Switzerland) – 2× Platinum – 100,000
United Kingdom (BPI) – 6× Platinum – 1,800,000
United States (RIAA) – 26× Platinum – 26,000,000
Released – December 8, 1976
Recorded – March – October 1976
Studio – Criteria Studios, Miami, FL and Record Plant Studios, Los Angeles, CA
Genre – Rock
Length – 43:28
Label – Asylum
Producer – Bill Szymczyk
Club Fact File
Chicago Bears | |
Founded | 1920 |
First Season Played | 1920 |
First Season in NFL | 1920 |
Ground | Soldier Field |
Capacity | 61,500 |
Previous Stadium(s) | Staley Field, Wrigley Field, Memorial Stadium |
Previous Names | Decatur Staleys, Chicago Staleys |
Trophies | |
NFL Champions | 1932, 1933, 1940, 1941, 1943, 1946, 1963 |
Superbowl Winners | 1986 |
NFC Champions | 1986, 2007 |
NFC Central Division Winners | 1984, 1985, 1986, 1987, 1988, 1990, 2001 |
NFC North Division Winners | 2005, 2006, 2010 |
NFL West Division Winners | 1933, 1934, 1935, 1937, 1940, 1941, 1942, 1943, 1946, 1956, 1963 |
Wildcard Playoff Berths | 1950, 1977, 1979, 1991 |
League Seasons | |
Seasons in NFL/AFL | 99 |
Seasons in NFC | 49 |
Seasons in NFL Western Division | 34 |
Seasons in NFL West (Central) Division | 3 |
Seasons in NFC Central Division | 32 |
Seasons in NFC North Division | 17 |
Story Time
Hate
I HATE YOU
They were the only words on the sheet of paper. All the letters had been carefully cut from newspaper headlines. They had been perfectly aligned in the middle of the page in front of him. He looked at the envelope the sheet of paper had come in. The name and address had been printed directly onto it. There was a stamp affixed to the top right hand corner of the envelope, but there was no postmark stamped onto the envelope.
Liam stood looking at the sheet of paper and the envelope for a couple of minutes. He was confused. He didn’t know who would have sent him such a letter. He wasn’t aware of anyone who hated him. He didn’t normally elicit strong emotions from anyone he met. He was nice, if a little dull, but wouldn’t be the kind of man to rile someone up like this.
He put them down on the pile of post and newspapers on the bookcase in the hall. He wondered if it was one of his friends trying to wind him up. He’d ask them next time he caught up with them.
By the time he did catch up with them on the Friday night he’d forgotten about the strange letter. It was now covered by other post and papers from the week on the pile on his bookcase.
After a heavy night, it was early afternoon on the Saturday when Liam finally surfaced. He stumbled into the hall and picked up his post, flicking through it as he wandered to the kitchen. He dropped most of it when he got to another envelope with his address printed directly onto it. It had a stamp but no postmark again. He nervously opened the flap of the envelope and slid the paper out of it.
I HATE YOU
THE CUT ON YOUR LEG IS ONLY THE START OF IT
As if in slow motion, Liam looked down to his bare legs. He hadn’t noticed any cut before. Yet there it was. A fresh looking cut about two inches long just below his left knee on his shin bone. He looked back at the letter and felt his head spinning. He ran to the bathroom and threw up. It didn’t seem like an alcohol induced upchuck. He’d had plenty of them over the years. How had someone managed to cut him without him noticing? How had it been done to coincide with him getting this letter?
Liam was freaked out. He stumbled back into the hall and to the pile of discarded post and papers. He shuffled through the pile and uncovered the original letter, and took them both to his desk in the living room. He got a pint of milk from the fridge and drank it as he looked at the letters trying to decide what to do. He was so engrossed that he knocked his milk over. He only just managed to stop it leaking down onto his printer.
Eventually Liam rang the police. They took his details, and the details of the letters. He was asked if he could think of anyone who might have sent the letters, even as a joke. He said it might have been a joke, but the cut to his leg made him think it wasn’t. He was asked to have a think about anyone who might hold a grudge against him, from any time in his life. They weren’t going to send anyone out, but if he wanted he could bring the letters down to the local station for them to analyse.
He sat in his armchair watching Soccer Saturday. He ordered pizza, and took on as many non-alcoholic drinks as he could from the rapidly depleting fridge. He didn’t bother dressing properly. He just sat there in the t-shirt and pants he had woken up in. The pizza delivery guy couldn’t get away fast enough.
Liam felt more human on Sunday; he left the flat to do some shopping. The letters were forgotten about, left on the printer on his desk which he didn’t touch all day. It was only when the cut itched as he lay in bed that he thought about them. Just what he needed when trying to get to sleep before the working week!
Liam woke up in a hospital bed on the Tuesday night. He looked around and wondered how the hell he had got there. A nurse came in and told him he had been found in a heap at the bottom of a flight of stairs at work. He had broken his left arm, badly sprained his left ankle and had been unconscious for four hours. The doctor came around later and examined him again. He was asked a lot of questions before the doctor told him they would be keeping him in overnight for observation. They would also need to put a cast on his heavily strapped arm.
The police came to see Liam not long after the doctor had left. They asked him about the fall down the stairs. Had he been pushed, did he remember seeing anyone else around at the time? But the incident was a blank space in his mind. The police told him they were waiting for the CCTV footage to be sent over, and that they would be in touch. He was given some painkillers and a sedative by the nurse and he drifted off to sleep.
Liam was released from the hospital in the middle of Wednesday afternoon. He hobbled into a waiting taxi, armed with pills and a list of instructions. When he opened the door to his flat he saw the envelope on the floor. It was the same as the previous two had ben. The same colour and size, his name and address printed directly onto it. A stamp sat in the top corner of the envelope, but there was no postmark. With trembling fingers he managed to prise the flap of the envelope open and take out the piece of paper within.
I HATE YOU
THAT WAS NO ACCIDENT
YOU REALLY DON’T BOUNCE VERY WELL
Liam didn’t quite make the bathroom this time. He threw up over the threshold of the bathroom door before stepping in it to get the next heave into the sink. He ached everywhere and he banged his cast laden left arm off the sink as he tried to remove it from the flow of water. He took his shoes off and rinsed them under the shower, leaving them in the tray to dry. He awkwardly cleaned up the mess from the floor and then hobbled to his desk to phone the police.
They were more responsive this time, especially after he told them other police had questioned him about his fall at work whilst he was in hospital. Two detectives came around to his flat on the Thursday morning. Liam had been signed off work for a week. His broken arm and sprained ankle wouldn’t have been enough normally, but the unconsciousness had made the difference. They had only let him out of hospital after he had lied about having friends to stay to keep an eye on him for any signs of concussion.
The detectives asked Liam a lot of questions. They bagged all the letters and envelopes and searched around the flat for any clues of forced entry. They took Liam’s fingerprints and DNA for elimination purposes, and gave him a direct number to call if he received any more letters, or if there were any more incidents.
Once they had left Liam went back to bed for a couple of hours. He was going to make the best use of the days off to follow the doctor’s instructions and rest. He was happy to have a break from work. It was becoming a pressurised environment nowadays, much more so than when he had started out.
There was a sudden loud bang against the bedroom window and Liam woke with a start and looked at the window. A large imprint of a bird in flight was smeared on the outside of it. He got up and shuffled out of the bedroom. There on the floor in the hall was another envelope. Liam made it to the bathroom on time for his stomach to give up their contents again. The latest message had read.
I HATE YOU
IT’S NO USE INVOLVING THE POLICE
THEY CAN’T HELP YOU NOW
YOU ARE A DEAD MAN WALKING
The same two detectives came back and bagged the letter and took it away. For the next four days Liam didn’t leave the flat. Spending all the time between his bed and his armchair watching mind-numbing TV. He dreaded hearing the approach of the postman in case another letter dropped onto his hall floor. He only relaxed on the Sunday when he knew there was no post that day. When there was a knock at the door on the Monday evening Liam jumped in fright.
A serious looking detective showed Liam his credentials and introduced two men in green medical scrubs before reading a statement.
“Liam Edwards, we are sectioning under section 3 of the Mental Health Act 1983, both for your own safety and the safety of those around you.
“Why, what have I done?”
“Mr Edwards, we have proof that you have been sending yourself the letters. My colleagues found a stack of the same envelopes in your printer tray, and a large number of cut out letters from the stack of newspapers in the hall. Your fingerprints are the only ones found on the letters. Your DNA is on the back of the licked stamps. We have reviewed the CCTV from your office building and you threw yourself down the stairs. It would appear you hate yourself. As we are not sure whether this is a cry for help or something deeper seated, the two orderlies are taking you to a secure mental health unit for evaluation and treatment.”
Liam broke down and cried. Elsewhere inside his head, Lester was celebrating.
Dilbert
13/08/2018
Epilogue
If you want to catch up on old issues, Drabbles I’ve had published, or the random scribbling from a bored mind on my blog then they are all available at http://www.onetruekev.co.uk/ there are links to a number of older publications I have done in the past, with more of the old stuff being added as time goes by.
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