Rat Rapping

Yes, I really am going there, with Roland Rat’s mid eighties novelty hit. Well with the Shrews in town, it’s all rodent related. Or at least small furry mammals.

Back to league action after the rollercoaster of the Tuesday night Bristol Street Motors Trophy game, the 3-4 loss at home to AFC Wimbledon. The week hasn’t been any less thrilling for me as it has progressed, and equally not in the best of ways.

I have been known to use the phrase ‘I would rather stick knitting needles in my eyes than…’ where the … hasn’t just been watching or reading something. A lot. A hell of a lot. However, I feel I may need to stop using that, or at least cut back on using that phrase. Having been diagnosed with diabetic macular oedema my right eye needs treatment, or a course of treatments, which involve injecting something into my eyeball. At which point I found my eyeballs are quite sensitive. They don’t even like drops being put in them. Even the numbing ones, let alone the antiseptic ones. And they don’t like the air blown into them to test the pressure. Eyeball pressure. Is that a thing? Blood pressure, tyre pressure, yes, I know them, but eye pressure is a new one on me. The eye is then clamped open, and a mask put over the rest of the face. I was told where to look (which is harder than it sounds, I seem to struggle to focus on one point unless it is straight on) and whilst concentrating on looking down and to the left they sneak in and stick the needle it the right side of the eyeball away from my peripheral vision. It doesn’t hurt, the numbing drops make sure of that, but it does feel weird (maybe that is psychosomatic as I’m not sure I’m feeling anything). And then there are bubbles of stuff (I don’t actually know what it is) floating around inside the eye. When the numbing drops wear off the eye is a bit sore, but I thank fuck that’s over. Only to remember there are four more injections to come at one a month. Trust me, after that, there is no chance of any fucking knitting needles going anywhere near my eyes thank you very much. Let’s just hope the treatment works and five is all I need and that they don’t decide the left one needs doing as well.

And then there were more needles this morning, one in each arm as I have COVID and flu jabs. But I don’t even seem to notice them going in. I just wonder where they are going to aim to stick the next needle. Let’s hope I don’t need an emergency tetanus shot, and they have to stick a needle in my arse.

The lesser spotted Reggie the Red has been seen. He was at Manor Royal as Crawley Town announced a marketing partnership with Manor Royal BID. As he has only been seen away from the Broadfield Stadium it does beg the question of whether he was identified as one of the phantom flare throwers and has therefore received a stadium ban meaning he is only able to make appearances offsite.

Anyway, on to today’s game and the visit of Shrewsbury Town (with chatter from people I know about how to pronounce it – is it Shrew or Shrow? Quite a rabbit hole to go down). It is one of only two League One games going ahead today due to international call ups. It might have been postponed if Eddie Beach hadn’t been out injured, and so we only had two call ups and not the three required. Shrewsbury are one of the small number of clubs below us in the league before kick-off, with them one place and two points behind us in twenty-second, and they have played a game more than us.

We haven’t played Shrewsbury since being relegated to League Two at the end of 2013-14 season. We did play them three seasons on the trot following our entering the league, as they were one of the other teams promoted that first season. We beat them in the first game we played against them at the Broadfield, but haven’t beaten them since, with two defeats and three draws since then.

I get to the ground nice and early after writing group and armed with my camera having found a new setting on it which automatically turns the photos into cartoonised versions. And it is a new obsession for me to play with, and so it is that setting which has provided all the photos for today’s piece.

Shrewsbury are in what looks like all white at first glance, but it has yellow trim. From the kick off it only takes us ten seconds to get a shot off. Rushian Hepburn-Murphy’s shot is off target, but it is a promising start.

There is a bit of back and forth and then Bradley Ibrahim feeds Ronan Darcy who eludes a tackle and has his shot deflected over for a corner which is taken deep but it goes straight out. The same combination link up again a few seconds later and Darcy’s shot is tipped around the post for another corner which is played short, and then across and back before being cleared. RHM surges forward on the other side and appears to be blocked off and down with a head injury, but it is another thirty seconds and with Shrewsbury up the other end before the ref brings play to a halt for treatment to be called on.

Darcy gets in again and has another shot, it is deflected again for another corner. The keeper flaps at it a bit but it is cleared. Shrewsbury have an attack and get a cross in and there is a clear header in the box, but it is straight at Connal Trueman for an easy save. Back on the attack and Darcy has another shot, but this one isn’t as accurate, and it flies over the KRL Logistics stand for the only ball loss of the day.

Shrewsbury get a free kick thirty-five yards out and float it to the back post and it is headed over. We get a long throw opportunity on the attack again and Josh Flint’s throw is flicked on by Jay Williams and cleared off the line Shrewsbury attack again, this time down the right wing and it is crossed in and half cleared, it falls to a Shrewsbury attacked and although Trueman gets hands to the ball the shot creeps in and we are 0-1 down. This cues up the Shrewsbury fans to start singing ‘How shit must you be, we’re winning away.’ Which appeals to my gallows sense of humour.

We get a free kick near halfway and it is floated in, and headed half clear to Toby Mullarkey whose shot is deflected for another corner. It is played short to Ibrahim who plays it back to Darcy and his shot from a tight angle goes high and wide. There is decent work down the left and Harry Forster crosses and Armando Junior Quitirna plays it back into the middle where Williams has a header tipped onto the bar and Will Swan is on hand to head the rebound in from two yards out to level things up 1-1.

Shrewsbury have a shot over the bar, and then we attack down the right again, but the final ball is just too strong for Swan to get on the end. It’s back up the other end as Shrewsbury attack and the cross goes through the six-yard box but luckily there is no one to get on the end of it. Shrewsbury are beginning to pick up bookings for their persistent fouling, but their number 27 looks unlucky to pick up his, as it was clearly their number 3 who committed the foul.

RHM does some decent work down the left and puts Swan in for another chance, and his shot is blocked and cleared, and Williams picks up a booking. Which I believe is number five of the league season, which means a one game ban for him. There are three added minutes at the end of the half before the half time whistle goes with the score level at 1-1.

The second half starts slowly, and it is a few minutes in when Shrewsbury have an attack, and a shot is tipped onto the post and comes back out before being cleared. At the other end Armando and Darcy link up but the cross is caught by the keeper. Another right-wing attack sees Armando in at a tight angle and his shot just goes past the far post.

Back at the other end Flint picks up a booking which looks a bit harsh, and it means he has also reached five for the season and will be suspended for a game. No, scrub that, less than a minute later he is adjudged to have another pull back on their number 9 and there is a second yellow and a red for him, so that will be two matches banned, and we are down to ten men. Both yellows look harsh, but the second was a silly one to get picked up for having only just picked up a yellow for the first challenge. We’re in a hole a mole would be proud of.

The resulting free kick is played into the box and the header is deflected for a corner, which is cleared for a throw. We attack down the left and Forster crosses from the byline and Armando is at the far post to put the ball in and we lead 2-1. And before we restart the scorer is substituted along with Darcy with Max Anderson and Panutche Camara coming on to replace them.

There is more concerted pressure from the eleven men of Shrewsbury against our ten men, but we do get a couple of breaks. Then Forster is injured defending as he slides to prevent a cross and gives a corner away. He is subbed off before the corner with Joy Mukena coming on to replace him, but at the same time RHM and Ibrahim are taken off as well, with Jeremy Kelly and Gavan Holohan coming on to replaced them. An unusual triple substitution before a set piece. The corner is taken, a shot saved, another sits the post and there is a goalmouth scramble before it is bundled in, and the scores are level again 2-2.

On the next attack a cross comes in from the right wing and the Shrewsbury attacker is going to ground before the ball is anywhere near and before any contact will Mullarkey, but a penalty is given and it’s a booking for Mullarkey, and stop me if you’ve heard this before today, but that makes five bookings for the season and he too will miss the next game due to suspension. The penalty sends Trueman the wrong way and we trail again 2-3. It’s seeming increasingly like the officials are doing their impression of the three blind mice.

We are struggling to get out of our own half now. Another cross comes in from the right and the shot is deflected for a corner. It is headed down at the far post and turned in and we now trail 2-4. It is like the wheel is spinning now, but the hamster is well and truly dead.

There are eight added minutes. We are attacking and Shrewsbury get the ball back and attack down the left, an early cross is put in and their number nine is all alone and puts the ball through Trueman and we are further behind 2-5.

We get a free kick thirty yards out and Kelly lines up to take it. It clips a player on the wall and wrong foots the keeper and finds its way into the net and we have pulled it back to 3-5. We attack again and a Kelly cross finds Swan and it is blocked out. There is still time for Mukena to pick up a late booking for a nothing challenge before the full-time whistle goes with another loss, this time 3-5.

The substitutions seemed strange and poorly timed, but our propensity to pick up stupid bookings cost us today. It was strange for us to have scored three goals in back-to-back games after a streak of scoreless games, and for us to lose both of those games.

The crowd was announced as being 4,215 with 384 away fans. There was no mention of a sponsors’ man of the match.

The loss sees us swap places with Shrewsbury and we drop to twenty-second in the table. More worryingly it looks as if we will be without Jay Williams, Toby Mullarkey, and Josh Flint for the away trip to Reading next week. Let’s hope Benjamin Tanimu makes it back from international duty fit and raring to go, we will need all the defensive help we can get next week.

Monday night sees the draw for the first-round proper of the FA Cup. It is on TV at 7pm and we are ball eighteen in the draw. Let’s hope for a decent draw for a change, a home tie against lower league opposition would be good.

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